Reflecting on the 2015 Living Stones Partnership Meeting

            It has been two months since I departed San Antonio, Texas, and the 2015 annual meeting of the Living Stones Partnership meeting. It was a gathering of friends and colleagues involved in ministry development. Many of those gathered identify as ministry developers; others lack that identification. But each of us gathered believe that God calls each of us to different ministries and empowers us with the gifts that we need to live into those ministries and thus live into serving the Missio Dei—the Mission of God. What a beautiful gathering of people filled with the spirit and love for God, God’s Mission, and the ministry of each and all!

            Yet, there also are challenges, and one of those challenges is in informing others about our passion for this “thing” we call “ministry development” and assisting each other in companioning our colleagues in the discernment and nurturing of their gifts in accordance with God’s call and mission. In that vein, I recommend that people read an article on our time together in February 2015, whether at the International Symposium or the annual Living Stones Partnership meeting. Follow this link to read an article by Carole Bell, of the Diocese of Northern Michigan, on both events. And if you wish to engage in conversation and further exploration of your thoughts, please explore further the Living Stones Partnership website and the various resources referenced on that site.

 

Theresa+

The Many “Hats” of Ministry Development

It has been nearly a year since I last posted to my blog. Not out of a lack of interest: I do enjoy writing. But I would guess it is more a matter of my difficulty in determining which hat or hats I am now wearing and whether I can hold on to them long enough to post something before the winds of change blow them away. 

Over the past year in the picturesque mountains of rural Western Maryland, I have experienced the highs and lows of mountaintops and valleys. I have held hands with a dozen or so active parishioners as they decided that they no longer could continue to hold services as a viable independent parish. Exhausted of energy, time and a range of needed talents, the people needed to look elsewhere to develop new church community relationships. We grieved together, but we knew that we needed to say “goodbye” to that which no longer was viable to participate in something new and growing. It was a courageous faith-filled decision, and I was blessed to be one of their companions.

I mourned that change as their parish priest, but I rejoiced in their strength of faith and resilience as they moved on to other parish communities. They have since discovered new interests and activities in their new church homes. Some have explored other new interests now that they no longer have had to be the sole (and soul) sustaining force in their previous community.

And now I rejoice again as I wear my ministry developer and diocesan staff “hat” as I see other church communities look at those same tired buildings and envision new possibilities for those facilities. Imagination—God-centered imagination--is at work as these church communities tour the buildings and suggest new life to be born inside. Like a young butterfly emerging from a cocoon, the possibilities are yet to unfurl.

Yet, I also explore several of the other “hats” that I wear as well. I continue to visit the sick, the dying, the grieving. I listen to their stories. I sit quietly beside them. I coax them to see the possibilities. I invite them to acknowledge God’s presence with them in the times of struggle and of rejoicing. And sometimes—yes, sometimes—I hear them speak of new ways in which to direct their energy as they emerge from loss, sickness or grief. Those are very special moments. I witness new life, and I am invited to the most precious of invitations: to companion them in their grief, fears and sadness.

Ministry development requires many hats and many hat changes. I wonder which hat I will wear next?! I guess I will know better tomorrow.

 

Theresa+

 

Learning the Traditions

As a ministry developer, I rely greatly on the energy and needs of the congregations that I serve to determine where I need to devote my energy, what can be a collaborative effort, and what can be delegated to others. As a part-time vicar for two churches—and ¼ time at each—I must do that. For reasons of good self-care and modeling the key principles of the ministry of all baptized—not to mention—pure practicability—it is a necessity.

This being my first Christmas season as their vicars, versus a developer traveling from church to church,  I must be cognizant of the potential burnout for folks as the parishes try to do all that they have always done, particularly during this season of preparation and anticipation. As Advent progresses and we approach Christmas, I am becoming increasingly aware of the myriad of traditions that my two churches have for the Advent and Christmas seasons. I am also discovering that many of these traditions are quite time-intensive to continue.

These traditions are ingrained in the memories and hearts of the people and not up for negotiation. When people walk through the church doors on December 24^th, they better see the same twinkling and inspirationally magical view that they have seen each year this night for many decades.

I agree. It is an inspirational moment for us all, as we finally feel like it is Christmas. And we can even say “Merry Christmas” without the angst of doing so out of season or even being culturally insensitive. It is truly special.

But as I see the spinning wheels and hear the ever-increasing list of decorations and “musts” for each of the churches—each of which has totally different lists—I wonder about whether we are missing the point of the season. The ever-faithful few who do all of the work make sure that Christmas happens exactly as it has for the past 50 years. The same dozens or so of family members who appear for their annual church visit are mesmerized by the beauty and emotion. They ooh and ah, and they leave the area again a few days later, never seeing how beautiful the church and the people are when we are doing church and not a special holiday “performance.”

All of this has me wondering: Do we decorate and do all of these traditional things for ourselves, so we can finally immerse ourselves in the beauty after the frantic race to get it all done? Are we doing this as a gift to those family members and friends who appear for church once or twice a year for Christmas and possibly Easter? More importantly, do we do this to honor, celebrate and remember the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ? Or are we too exhausted and busy to notice or care anymore?

Those are the questions that keep me awake at night and distracted by day. I cannot answer them, as I have my own memories of traditions and customs from the dozens of churches of which I have been a member through the years. These are not my traditions. I am an outsider; even if I love these traditions, they will never be mine, for I lack the lineage to own them. Only my loyal flock can answer these important questions--that much I know. But I wonder whether they ever stop to ask these questions as well, and how they might answer them. The reality is: I will never know.

I suspect that these traditions are important as a means of hospitality to others, as well as an act in reverence to God and Christ. If I were to move away and return again in 20 years, I expect that I would enjoy the same beauty and views that I will see December 24 of this year. And perhaps that is okay. I guess that is all part of the preparation and anticipation. It also is all about our love for our holiday visitors and, more importantly, for God.

Theresa

Autumn Reflections

I am blessed to live and work in the mountains of Maryland, where fall means brilliantly colored trees, followed by a flurry of raking as the leaves fall from the trees, decorating the yards and fields.  And all while dealing with the ever-growing grass that seems to peek out between the colored leaves that dot my yard. I am graced with a full palette of color and textures of moist grass and drying leaves as I travel the roads of western Maryland.

It also is a time when activity seems to peak within the churches and communities. Fall festivals attract people from far and near, bringing visitors to the region, competing for hotels and restaurants with the college students and their alums. Churches compete with each other with harvest dinners of turkey and ham, accompanied by homemade cakes and pies. Fresh apple butter smeared on homemade bread or biscuits is a treat that I particularly enjoy this time of year.

Church doors and windows close to keep out the chill, and church attendance increases as people return to school and work. Each week is like a homecoming as people catch up with each other and what all they have been doing the past few months.

The musty smell of furnaces being lit to take away the evening chill remind us that winter weather is swiftly approaching. The so-called lazy days of summer are gone, and the days when we wall ourselves up inside are not yet upon us. We approach our lives as if this were our last chance for community before the uncertainty of bad weather haunts us once again.

My question is: Where do people find this new-found energy? As a missioner and ministry developer, I seem to be out of step with everyone else. I love the smells and tastes of autumn, but I frankly find that the life of a ministry developer is quite exhausting this time of year. Church activities are at a high, and I am still recovering from the task of filling in for all of the vacationing clergy over the past three months. I hate cold weather, so I certainly don’t look forward to that, but I find myself wistful for the slower pace of winter (other than Advent and Christmas and Lent, of course!).

Hmmm. Perhaps it just means that I have my work cut out for me—ministry development in sync with the development and training of new ministers! I think I finally got it—so watch out folks! This ministry developer is now on the prowl to deputize more ministers to help with this wonderful task of doing church in Western Maryland. Don’t say I did not warn you!

Theresa

Yes, I really DO need to consult my calendar

As a ministry developer, I seem to be in transit between churches and congregations much of the time, if not literally, at least figuratively. I switch gears many times each day between projects but also between focusing on one church or congregation versus another. I generally preach and lead services at two different churches on a Sunday, often for three services in boomerang fashion. That means totally different audiences with totally different personalities, and thus often different sermons depending on how God might be speaking to me as I pray over the readings and get further inspired while standing in the pulpit.

The Sunday morning of worship services might then be followed by pastoral visits for a vacationing clergy person from one of those churches or even a third church or a fourth. Oh, and what about the mid-week services? It may be easy to find supply for the vacationing clergy on a Sunday, but what about the mid-week services? With bi-vocational clergy in so many of the churches, they are unavailable to help with that need, so if means I get the opportunity to spend time with a different pocket of parishioners who frequent the mid-week morning or evening services.

Or what about any weekday nursing home services that rotate between the area Episcopal and other churches? Oh yes. Which ministerium or ministeriums should I join? And do their meetings or liturgical discussions overlap or can I attend them all? As the coordinator and supervisor of some of the other Episcopal clergy, should I even not be involved, to allow the truly local clergy have their own fellowship and educational group with “the supervisor” also attending?

And what about the Episcopal transplant to our attractive and ever-growing retirement destination? The shut-ins without any attachment to a specific local parish should not fall between the cracks merely because they have no local connection to a church. Thus, I am graced with the opportunity to actually have a small “congregation” of folks—albeit they do not meet together—that considers me their pastor as I visit with them and bring them communion.

And I really must not forget the ministry development components of the position. Another shifting of gears is needed. Thank goodness for e-mail and phones, especially mobile ones! I also must not forget my trusty GPS for those visits to little corners of the region. It really is not very helpful to follow a local’s directions when the directions involve turning by the “old Walmart” and then the Smith farm when the Walmart building is now something entirely different and the Smith farm is now a residential development and have been so long before I moved to the region.

Maybe it is the detective in me, but the mystery of where my day might lead keeps my day interesting and helps me increasingly love doing what I do. Admittedly, keeping track of my whereabouts and proposed whereabouts is not easy. So, when I actually tell folks that I need to check my calendar/date book, remember that I really do!! I simply cannot keep track of it all in my head, and I don’t even try to! Let’s just hope I don’t lose my datebook! Or it may mean a very lost Theresa!

Theresa

Matchmaker, Matchmaker

I found myself humming and singing the lyrics to the refrain from the well-known song from Fiddler on the Roof as I reflected on the life of a ministry developer working with more than a half a dozen churches. It also is where my heart lies--connecting people and resources, connecting people with people, and locating resources and information. It is the detective in me and perhaps in any effective ministry developer. We assist churches and people in getting "connected"; we make "matches." And it does not violate any canon on improper relationships!

Seems like learning how to make these connections is one of the most important skills (gifts?) that a ministry developer needs to be effective. No one expects the ministry developer to have all of the information or even be good at all things, but an effective developer does need to know how to research, locate, and pass along information. It also does not hurt if the ministry developer also loves being this matchmaker, which I do! Perhaps that is the reason I also found myself also humming part of the tune from The Sound of Music--"these are a few of my favorite things."

Theresa

Personality Types and Ministry Development

When I have completed Myers Briggs Type Indicator™ personality assessment questionnaires in the past, my balance between any two of the indicators has varied from time to time. All of this has depended on the time in my life at which I was completing the questionnaire and whether or not the assessment program had a spirituality, vocational, or other basis.

Despite these variations, however, I generally “test” out as being fairly strong on the Introversion end of the Introversion to Extroversion scale and very strong on the Judging end of the Judging and Perceptive scale. In my past professions I simply needed to make decisions, meet deadlines, and move on. This trait has been quite helpful in my current vocation and particularly today as I find myself putting together a sermon or a service booklet for a particular Sunday or Holy Day.

I also have tended to be more highly Sensory, versus iNtuitive on the S/N scale. Thinking or Feeling? A borderline case for me, although I generally score slightly closer to Thinking rather than Feeling. My previous professions as a tax lawyer and a legal editor caused me to be more of a Thinker than I am or need to be today, when Feeling certainly seems to play more into the work of a ministry developer.

I ponder all of this as I think about how my personality type seems to interplay with my current calling to ministry development. As a ministry developer, I need to be a good listener and withhold judgment as I take in the relevant information. Yet, I must make quick decisions in times of urgency or when I have limited time with the persons with whom or for whom a decision is needed.

Perhaps it is my introverted, sensory nature of sitting quietly, observing the group dynamics, and analyzing what I was hearing before speaking--and thus being “the invisible person”--that prepared me well for sitting, taking in information, thinking on it, and then considering solutions. My petite stature, the stereotypical view of women, and my ability to sit quietly (as introverts are more prone to do) seems to fit well with this calling. (As anyone who is good at being “invisible” will tell you, remaining quiet is the key to information gathering. Speaking reminds others of your presence and thus you lose the benefit of invisibility.) I guess the one “growing edge,” as they say, with my MBTI fitting with the nature of this work is that I need to withhold the Judging aspect so that I withhold judgment as I take in the information. Did I read that gesture of body language correctly? Did I detect something in the tone of voice that indicates an issue? Or, am I overanalyzing it all? Is the person just having a bad day and so the extraneous information is luring me away from the “correct” path of thinking?

With a supportive supervisor and colleagues, I am honing that urge to come to judgment based on limited information. I regularly use them for reality checks and to bounce off ideas. I also benefit from their wisdom that is less clouded by the trees that might be obscuring my view. All of this is to say that all of this is an evolving process and that perhaps with my MBTI being as it is, my allocation between the various types will slide a bit here and there as I discover and hone the traits best suited to do this work—God’s work.

Theresa 

The Special Moments in Parishioners’ Church Lives

As the itinerant priest, I float from church to church on Sundays and holidays, trying to conform to the church norms--what they might include or exclude from their services, what songs they sing, whether they stand or sit at certain times, etc. But I remain nevertheless the outsider. I am the outsider who is available in times of crisis as well as those times when they simply need a priest for the day. I will never be a member of the parish, although I work hard to get to know the folks, their concerns, and even their likes and dislikes. I remain the missioner, the ministry developer, and even simply the supply priest. I will make the wrong assumptions about what is the “norm” from time to time. Virtually all of the churches can speak to times where I forgot which church’s norm I needed to follow and started leading the “wrong” (as in the not customary) prayer or canticle.

Yet, I also need to guide the churches and their teams to “try on” different ways to do liturgy, different ways to do church. That generally does not endear me with folks who like things they way they always have been, but I understand the fine line that I walk, I walk the fine line in balancing the two concerns, sometimes successfully and sometimes not so much so. I am sure that the churches can tell anyone better than I can how I score on that front. But, I guess I am doing at least okay on that front.  I invested a lot of time early on in spending time, sitting, listening, and of course eating with the people. We rural churches do know how to cook, as they say!

But today I am thinking of those other times, those special times in parishioners’ church lives when being the outsider and the “newbie” is a further reminder of that status. The fact is: as a priest without a church home, I have few opportunities for doing these special liturgies, such as baptisms and weddings. These are special celebrations that intersect greatly with nostalgia, memory and friendships. The persons involved want certain clergy who have been instrumental to their church lives to conduct the services, in their churches. I agree with that goal. I know that I wished to do the same when I was planning the key moments in my own church and personal/family lives.

I wonder at times if I might ever be involved in any of those special events in the people’s lives. It certainly would be an honor and a privilege. It’s not like I am being selected because they like the beautiful church building! I have none!! But when that time may come, there remains a key interpersonal issue: How do I become involved with the service without hurting the “home” team members’ feelings. I am hoping that what I expressed earlier in this posting will hold true. In other words, that I will have built the connections with the folks that they do not see it as an affront but an addition to all that they may provide. The clergy have the opportunity to celebrate and even worship with the people instead of performing. I would not ever want to step on toes or cause hard feelings. In fact I would hope that I would try to incorporate the others in the church to the extent possible so that all feel that they are being fed, spiritually and otherwise. I am an additional guide and shepherd for assisting the church in providing for the spiritual and other needs of the church’s parishioners. I am helping them serve. I am just another instrument for doing so. When I remind myself of that fact, all seems to be just as it should be. I should be able to walk that fine line and soften any hard feelings that might arise out of such a situation. I know impact and intent are two different things. I hope that my extensive training on that dichotomy will come in helpful in doing the dance but also remind me that apologies sometimes will be needed. I just cannot guaranty that the impact will parallel with the intent each and every time. But good relationships, a genuine love for the people and an authentic apology certainly cannot hurt!

I guess what it comes down to is: I can only continue to observe, learn, watch, and pray on that. Yes, prayer seems to be at the heart of it all. I guess my prayer is that God may guide me through the discernment process as the situations arise, so that I proceed with wisdom and pastoral care--so that I proceed in a thoughtful manner that serves the Church and its people. That is about the best I can do, right?

Theresa

Springtime Amnesia

Oh, the pleasures of springtime in rural Western Maryland! The church yards and unpaved roads may be muddy from the nearly-daily rain, but (alas!) we begin to enter our annual amnesia of the hazards of travel during the less pleasant (at least for me!) periods of ice and snow.

The women’s groups may now resume their monthly meetings. We can plan other evening activities as well. Unlike our urban and suburban church friends, our activities ramp up, instead of slowing down.

Sure, the churches with young children slow down and stop having children’s activities because of soccer, softball, and camping activities.  But those churches with few children and youth seem to find renewed energy as they host their fundraising dinners, look to parishioners to assist with monthly church workdays, and host festivals and picnics once again.

I notice more smiles and a renewed commitment to engage in activities, certain that a May or June snow is unlikely to create travel concerns. I notice that I am energized as well. I now can go to evening meetings and not begin and end in the dark. Even memorial services and celebrations of peoples’ lives can be scheduled without wondering if icy roads are in store.

The flipside? We now must worry about excessive heat. Will the wedding party wilt for the lack of a good breeze in our “natural-air-conditioned” churches? For me, the biggest challenge is projecting my voice throughout an entire worship service, including sermon, with the doors open to allow a nice breeze (and perhaps even a stray bird or creature to enter). Will the friendly bear that enjoys the church’s dumpster dare to come and join us in our melodious singing as well?

Ah—I love the life of a missioner! Winter and early spring may pose travel concerns and possibly unexpected cancellations, but oh the wonders of late spring and summer! The fresh breeze wafting in the windows and the casual, more intimate nature of worshiping amidst the sounds and smells of nature is so inviting. Suburbia does not know what it is missing.

Theresa